“Why do you like being a mom?”
The question from my fellow classmate surprised me. I stared at the table stacked with her books, a slice of pepperoni pizza, a tray of vegetarian sushi and two coffees. She was a grandma now but had started her degree back when her children were the same ages as mine. We’d talked about motherhood and classes and juggling both of those.
Somehow I stumbled out an answer to her question, but it stuck with me.
I found myself wondering not “why do I like being a mom” but “do I like being a mom?” and “would my girls say I like being a mom?”
Since I was a little girl, I have planned to be a mom. I was the girl at church who always wanted to hold the babies. Through my teens, my primary job was as a babysitter. The families I babysat for liked me because I actually played with their kids. When I was considering a career, writing seemed natural not only because it was something I loved to do but because I could do it from home, like Tricia Goyer and Nancy Rue and many other authors I know.
And now that’s what I’m doing: trying to raise three girls and pursue my writing. Do I like being a mom? There are many days when I get frustrated because Lily has had an accident again and the dishes are piling up by the sink again and the baby won’t sleep so I can’t get anything done and there are toys all over the floor and… And yet there are many days when I do enjoy all the household chores and welcoming my husband home at the end of his day because I feel I have made our house a home.
In every other job I’ve worked, I’ve been ready to quit when it was time to quit, because I was bored. While I get frustrated working at home, I’ve never been bored. Each day is new and different as the girls go through different stages. I look forward to that.
Would they say I like being a mom? That question bothered me more. I know that many times I’ve gone to bed regretting having a short temper, yelling at them again for not getting out the door fast enough or spilling their cereal or just wanting a hug when I was trying to do the dishes. If they were asked that question, they might say that Mommy was always tired and grouchy, or that she liked her computer better than them, or that the vacuuming was more important than reading books together. That’s not what I want them to say.
So in my last months of pregnancy, as I contemplated my classmate’s question and the changes that a third baby would bring to our lives, I also thought about the mom I want to be. I’m trying to slow down, to better balance my desire for a clean house with their desire for attention, to limit my online time and find more activities for them, to show them the patience and respect that I want them to show me. I’m not always successful at this, but thankfully, there’s a new day tomorrow.
Why do you like being a mom?
8 Comments
Interesting post. A different perspective for sure. Would our children say we have enjoyed being a mother? Mine are grown but just yesterday my son, 25 yrs. old, told me that he thought both his dad & I have been exceptional parents. It was very humbling to hear his say. And all I could respond was only by His grace did we not mess it all up. Being a mom is the hardest work we will ever do. Also the most rewarding. Thank you for sharing this. I was your neighbor at Fellowship Fridays 🙂
Loved this post! I was also the girl babysitting and surrounded by babies and little kids growing up. I was an aunt at a very young age (my oldest niece is 6 years younger than me).
One time I was babysitting for my brother and his wife and they came home and the kids and I were all outside playing hide and seek, lol!
He was hoping they’d be in bed but I lost track of time(I was only 14 so not real great with time management yet, lol!)
My kids are older now and they don’t remember the times where I lost it and cried, or yelled and things like that.
Of course, that’s not a reason to just let loose on ’em, lol!
I went ahead and linked up today as I forgot to do it on Monday.
Thanks so much for linking up to “Making Your Home Sing Monday” linky party today! 😉
Great post! Thanks for stopping by my blog 🙂
I can’t really pinpoint WHY I like being a mom. It’s something I always dreamed of, and while I don’t love the hard days when the kids are challenging everything, I love seeing them grow and explore
What a great read! I love motherhood and I never knew I would until I saw those two faint lines on my pregnancy test. There’s good days and bad days but there is nothing like the love between a mother and child. I love motherhood and could not imagine my life any other way. Seeing the world through my son’s eyes…it’s magic and we get to be kids again…sort of 🙂
What a truly wonderful post about motherhood and I love how you really took a look at the question. It has me thinking about it now and I’m going to write about it this week. Great share!
What a fabulous, thoughtful post! I used to love being a mom and I found that as my boys grew, I had forgotten about myself and my own goals too much. Now I try to balance their wants with my own a little more and hopefully reach a happy medium in which all three of us can feel supported, loved and fulfilled, even without my constant devoted attention!
I think my kids would say the same about me, and I can totally relate on feeling frustrated but by the end of the day I’ve usually calmed down and decided it’s all worth the cuddles they give when they are cheery.