How to Find a Good Female Therapist for Women’s Counselling

You’ve decided you want a female therapist – and that’s completely okay.

Maybe you feel more comfortable opening up to a woman. Maybe past experiences make a female provider feel safer. Maybe it’s cultural, religious, or simply a gut feeling you can’t quite name. Whatever your reason, you don’t need to justify your preference to anyone.

The good news: roughly 70% of practicing therapists are women, which means your preference is highly findable. The challenge is knowing where to start looking, how to filter online searches effectively, and what to evaluate beyond gender to find someone who’s truly the right fit for your needs.

This guide walks you through exactly that – from specific directories and filtering tools to questions you should ask in a consultation. By the end, you’ll have a clear, actionable path to finding women’s counselling from a qualified female therapist who’s the best fit for you.

This guide provides general information to help you navigate finding a therapist. It’s not a substitute for professional mental health advice. If you’re in crisis, contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988.

Your Preference for a Female Therapist Is Valid

You don’t need permission to want a female therapist. And you definitely don’t need to justify it to anyone – including yourself.

People prefer female therapists for all kinds of reasons. Maybe you feel more comfortable opening up to a woman. Maybe past experiences – including trauma – make a male provider feel unsafe. Maybe it’s cultural or religious. Or maybe it’s just a gut feeling you can’t quite explain.

All of these are legitimate.

Research backs this up. Studies show that women report higher comfort disclosing personal information to female therapists, particularly around sensitive topics like relationships, body image, or trauma. Psychiatrist Dr. Lantie Jorandby, who specializes in addiction treatment, notes that women who’ve experienced trauma – especially trauma involving men – often feel significantly more at ease with a female provider.

Certain concerns may especially benefit from a female therapist’s perspective: reproductive health, postpartum challenges, navigating workplace sexism, or anything tied to experiences that feel uniquely gendered.

Here’s what to say when you reach out:

When you call a practice or submit an inquiry, keep it simple: “I’d specifically like to see a female therapist.” That’s it. No lengthy explanation required.

If someone asks why, “personal preference” is a complete answer. A good intake coordinator will note your request and move on. If they push back or seem dismissive, that tells you something important about whether they’re the right fit for you.

Your preference matters. Now let’s talk about where to find the right person.

When Women’s Counselling May Especially Help

Your preference is valid no matter your reason. But for certain concerns, a female therapist’s perspective adds particular value:

• Reproductive and hormonal health: Postpartum depression, pregnancy loss, infertility, perimenopause – these experiences are hard to fully grasp without living them. A female therapist who’s navigated fertility struggles might simply nod and say, “That’s such a complicated grief.” Less explaining, more processing.
• Trauma involving men: If your trauma involves a male perpetrator – abuse, assault, harassment – working with a woman often feels safer. You’re not managing your nervous system while wondering if your therapist truly gets it.
• Body image and eating concerns: Diet culture hits women differently. A female therapist has likely faced the same pressures around weight, appearance, and “taking up space” – creating a shortcut to real understanding.
• Navigating gendered experiences: Workplace sexism, unequal domestic labor, being dismissed by doctors. When you say “My boss talked over me again,” a female therapist has probably lived her own version.
• Motherhood transitions: New parenthood, identity shifts, the guilt spiral of working vs. staying home – these conversations often flow easier with someone who understands the pressures mothers face.

Here’s the thing: Male therapists can absolutely help with all of these – many are excellent. But shared experience closes the gap between you and your provider. And that ease matters. I’ve seen numerous therapists over the past twenty plus years, both male and female, but I’ve always had the best help from therapists whose life and educational experience most closely match mine. 

Where to Find Female Therapists

The good news: roughly 70% of practicing therapists are women. The challenge is knowing exactly where to look – and how to filter your search so you’re not scrolling through hundreds of profiles.

Start with These Directories

Psychology Today is the most widely used therapist directory, and it makes filtering easy. Here’s exactly what to do:

1. Go to psychologytoday.com/us/therapists (in the US) or psychologytoday.com/ca/therapists (in Canada).
2. Enter your zip or postal code or city name.
3. At the top of the list, you can choose to filter therapists by male, female, in-person, or online. Click “all filters” to add any other filters (insurance, specialty, types of therapy, languages spoken, etc).

You’ll get a list of female therapists in your area with photos, bios, and contact information. Most profiles include the therapist’s approach, specialties, and whether they’re accepting new clients. Read through their profiles carefully, visit their websites for more information, and then choose a few to reach out to for an intake session.

Other reputable directories to check:

• APA Psychologist Locator: Specifically for licensed psychologists in the US (locator.apa.org)
• GoodTherapy: Allows gender filtering with detailed provider profiles for therapists in both the US and Canada.
• Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA)’s Treatment Locator: US government resource for mental health services
• Inclusive Therapists: Focuses on culturally responsive care
• Specialized directories: Therapy for Black Girls, Asian Mental Health Collective, Latinx Therapy, and others serve specific communities

If You Have Insurance

Call your insurance company directly and ask: “Can you send me a list of in-network female therapists in my area?” They’re required to provide this. You can also check your insurer’s online portal – most allow filtering by gender. Some insurance companies only cover therapists with specific qualifications, such as psychologists, so check this before choosing your therapist.

When Options Are Limited

If female therapists near you have long wait-lists, telehealth and online appointments expand your options significantly. Many therapists now see clients virtually, meaning you’re not limited to your immediate area. Don’t wait for one perfect option. Reach out to three to five therapists at once, join wait-lists, and keep searching. The right fit is worth the effort.

What to Look For Beyond Gender

Gender matters – but it’s not the only factor. Once you’ve found female therapists in your area, evaluate a few other things to find someone truly qualified for your needs.

Verify Licensure First

Every therapist should be licensed in your state – you can check through your state’s licensing board website. Common credentials include:

• LCSW (Licensed Clinical Social Worker): Master’s in social work plus supervised clinical hours
• LMFT (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist): Specializes in relationships and family dynamics
• LPC (Licensed Professional Counsellor): General mental health counselling training
• PhD or PsyD (Psychologist): Doctoral-level training; can provide psychological testing

All require graduate education and thousands of supervised hours. The letters matter less than whether they’re licensed and experienced with your specific concerns.

Match their Specialty to Your Needs

A therapist listing “anxiety, depression, trauma, couples therapy, life transitions, stress, grief, and self-esteem” might be a generalist – not a specialist in what you need. Look for someone who specifically mentions your primary concern. If you’re dealing with postpartum anxiety, find someone who says exactly that – not just “women’s issues.”

Watch for red flags: vague bios, no clear specialties, or profiles that haven’t been updated in years.

Signs of a Good Fit in Women’s Counselling

Most therapists offer a free 15-20 minute phone consultation before you commit. Use it. This is your chance to assess whether someone feels right – not just whether they’re qualified on paper.

What to Ask

Keep it simple. A few key questions tell you a lot:

• “What’s your experience working with [your specific concern]?”
• “What does a typical session look like with you?”
• “How will we know if therapy is working?”

Listen to how they respond. Do they answer clearly, or give vague, generic replies? Do they seem genuinely interested in your situation?

What to Notice

Pay attention to how you feel during the conversation. Do you feel heard? Rushed? Judged? Comfortable enough to imagine opening up to this person?

Here’s the thing: Research involving over 30,000 clients across 295 studies found that the therapeutic alliance – your connection with your therapist – is the strongest predictor of successful outcomes. Stronger than the specific therapy method. Stronger than their credentials.

A match in personalities is just as important between therapist and client as a match in experience. For example, two of my daughters tried the same therapist. That therapist was a good fit for one daughter and not the other. The therapist had great credentials and experiences and clicked with one of my daughters, but the personality differences made her not a great fit for my other daughter, so she moved on to another therapist.

That gut feeling matters.

Give It a Few Sessions

One conversation isn’t always enough. Try three to five sessions before deciding. But if you notice red flags – dismissiveness, poor listening, or boundary issues – trust yourself and move on. You don’t need to provide a reason for moving on; if you just feel the therapist is not a good fit, even if you can’t quite express why, just begin your search again and try another therapist. Please don’t give up on therapy simply because one therapist didn’t work for you.

Insurance, Costs, and Practical Logistics

Therapy costs vary widely, so sort out the logistics before you start reaching out. A little prep now prevents surprises later.

Check Your Insurance First

If you have insurance, start with your in-network options – they’ll cost the least out of pocket. Call your insurer and ask for a list of in-network female therapists, or search their online portal with gender filters.

Don’t skip out-of-network options too quickly. Many PPO plans reimburse 60-80% of out-of-network therapy costs. It’s worth a phone call to check.

Know the Cost Range

Without insurance, expect to pay $100-200 per session, depending on your location and the therapist’s experience. Online therapy platforms often cost less – sometimes $60-90 per week. Always ask about sliding scale fees. Many therapists reserve spots for clients who can’t afford full rates. If you don’t ask, you won’t know.

Free Options to Consider

Check if your employer offers an Employee Assistance Program (EAP). These provide free short-term therapy – usually five to six sessions – and are completely confidential. It’s a good starting point while you search for a longer-term fit.

Depending on why you need therapy, there may be other supports to help pay for it. For example, some women’s transition organizations offer free therapy for women and children escaping abusive situations. In Canada, victims of crime can access the Criminal Victims Assistance Program to help pay for their therapy related to supporting their emotional recovery from that crime.

Online vs. In-Person

Both work. Research shows telehealth and online therapy is just as effective for most concerns. If local options are limited or wait-lists are long, going virtual expands your choices significantly. I’ve been doing online appointments for several years now and find them very convenient, especially as a busy mom with kids, as it means my appointments are only an hour instead of an hour plus travel time.

Your Next Step

You now have everything you need: directories to search, filters to use, questions to ask, and language to communicate your preference confidently.

Start today. Pick two or three directories from this guide and send inquiry messages to three to five female therapists who match your criteria. Don’t wait for the “perfect” option – reach out to several and see who responds.

Give yourself permission to try a few sessions before committing. If the fit isn’t right, switch. Finding the right therapist sometimes takes a couple of tries, and that’s completely normal.

Remember: wanting a female therapist is valid. Advocating for what you need is part of taking care of yourself. Seeking help isn’t weakness – it’s one of the strongest things you can do.

You’ve got this.

If you’re in crisis: Contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988. Free, confidential support is available 24/7.