Several years ago, we went to a family dance on Vancouver Island. After saying hi to several friends, I mentioned to one mom, “Looks like your son has made a new friend here!” He was busy twirling a blonde girl his age around the dance floor. My friend said, “Oh, didn’t you know? That’s our new daughter.”
In the next few years, her daughter became a good friend to my daughter Sunshine. For National Adoption Awareness Month, I asked my friend to share her daughter’s adoption story.
First Comes Marriage, then Comes…
After my husband and I got married, we were eager to start a family. We wanted at least four children. At the time, it seemed to take forever before I got pregnant—a whole 7 months! Our son was born and we were all in love!
A year later, we discussed whether we should try for another baby now. I got pregnant fairly quickly this time—what a surprise! Four days after we had the positive test, I miscarried.
I was devastated, as was my husband. We had two more early miscarriages in the following year and a half. We decided to try to seek fertility help and also completed an Adoption Application. Both were long roads. There was yet another miscarriage.
We started the Adoption Application and finished our Home Study a year later, which was necessarily intrusive.
We finally saw the fertility doctor after a long 6-month referral wait. I had just found out I was pregnant again. I was ridiculously anxious during this pregnancy. I called everyone I knew and asked them to pray. We did blood work, ultrasounds. Things didn’t look positive from the doctor’s perspective and my anxiety grew.
Eight weeks in, I miscarried again. I was stressed. It took me a long time to recover emotionally and physically this time. We didn’t talk about adoption for a long time.
The Phone Call
Two and a half years after submitting our application, we got a phone call about a little girl. She was 6 months older than our son, who was 5 by this time. He had wanted a sibling for a long time. He was on this road with us, and was excited to hopefully have a child found for us.
We were given a 2-inch thick package of her history. Some of it was so heart wrenching. She unfortunately had been in four foster homes. Thankfully she was now in a stable situation and ready for a family. We felt that God had found her for us. He was giving us a gift, and so we said yes! We spent that summer getting to know her, and her us.
Happily Ever After
She has now been part of our family for almost 3 and a half years. I have to almost remind myself that she wasn’t always here. The kids are true siblings, and it really isn’t always easy.
I can’t say if it would have been an easier life if we hadn’t adopted, but I can say that we all needed her. She has been a blessing in so many ways, and I thank God for his amazing plan. This road He pushed us on has lead us on an adventure, to grow, to love, and share.
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One Response
Thanks for sharing this. I like how gently the writer presents what the general public often assume (friend) before being informed (adopted — sibling). I also like how she states ‘it isn’t always easy’….they are a family that shares and cares (struggles and joys) like all of us.
I have family members and friends who have been through this process as parents and as children. I have been and continue to be “”blessed”” by all of them.